AU REVOIR 2011 - Part 1

2010 is coming to an end. For some reasons, I haven't been able to do justice to the facebook status I had put at the outset this year - "Each year of life has been better than the last, here's to hoping the same for this year - Happy new Year". There aren't any golden moments to revisit this year. It has been a dull, drab year which has seen the fountain of confusion spouting at the highest intensity. Each night , I had a revelation about how I wanted to spend my life, only to go to the complete opposite other side of the pendulum the next day. This earned me the nickname of Jhoole Baba, from myself.


That I spent 3 weeks down with dengue might be the only thing I remember this year for, except the confusion ofcourse. I also spoilt the reputation I had earned in all the 14 years of my student life till now, by attending classes even on mass-bunk days and not agreeing to it on other occasions, the side effects of dengue supposedly. This was the year when I would finally study something for my exams, after a gap of 3-4 years. I spent exponentially lesser time on music this year then the past few ones. I got 3 interns this year but squandered them all due to various reasons. I got a chance to intern with a start-up in the summers where interns would watch porn to pass their time. It was a nice experience, though I could have learned much more than the tiny little I did. I got to meet new characters, there's no dearth of them anyway. I got to spend time with one of the founders, just 2 years senior to me. The day my 4th sem result was declared, he said -Arey, main to bhool hi gaya 7th aur 8th sem ka result dekhna tha college main. Han, aur degree bhi leni thi. I made a new friend there as well. I wonder why people say we love in a bad world, most of the people make me believe the exact opposite.


Each night saw the realization of new philosophies ranging from how to live life to how to go about cracking placements. I also got to know this year the hidden St. Anger hidden inside me. This has been the first year in years that I have left most my emotions behind. It had been so many years that thinking was the only thing I did. Just sitting, listening to music and thinking. There was none of it this year. Those emotions mellowed greatly. Life has mostly been a race this year.


It was a year when I have spent much time thinking about right and wrong, thanks to a friend who lives by what is right. I have grappled hard with logic to change my thoughts which otherwise I would never have done. I have just started out on this path. I have learnt not to judge people on the first looks, or on just one or two incidents.


I have discovered a new hunger this year. The only similarity between this hunger and the normal hunger is the region in which they originate. No, I'm not being metaphorical. The hunger to learn something new everyday, the hunger to be satisfied with myself at the end of the day. I found it hard to sleep any day without fulfilling this hunger. I normally would give up one or two hours of my sleep just to fulfill this hunger before sleeping. On many days, I had to contend with sleeping hungry.


This was the melancholic part. Now for the good news, towards the end of this year, I have started seeing some positive changes in me. I have always been honest with others, but I am developing the courage to be honest to myself too. I always considered it to be tough, so I have always run away from my most inner thoughts.


There was one day which I can distinctly say was the best day of the year. The day Deloitte came for interns. I managed to clear the prelims of the first company I sat for and I managed to hold myself in the GD. I din't expect myself to speak a word in the GD, leave aside the good presentation I delivered. However, that wasn't what made it the best day. After a good friend got selected, the party that ensued made it the finest day. A lunch at McD's followed by some amazing time with friends at Akshardham, and finally me retorting to his remark when he said that it had been a perfect day - It would have been had I been in his place. We all broke into laughter.


The second best day was actually a night. On the last day of Engifest, I managed to convince my parents to allow me to stay back in hostel for the night. When they said yes after some convincing from my side, I knew that the night was going to be one I wouldn't forget. To stay away for home for the whole night was very up in my wishlist. We friends din't sleep the whole night. Had a late night desi but awesome dinner. Then we chatted away the whole night. Before that, we had to take care of a friend who thought that of the 2 beds we had for 6 twenty-year olds to sleep, he could have one completely for himself. Naturally, we kicked his ass off the bed. It pleases me to no end that we are friends again. He is very dear to me, having known him since 10 years. While many may not take him seriously, I do respect him.


I finally got to take car to college this last semester, after having been after my parents'  life since an year , carpooling with 3 other friends. We have had some great conversations and debates and I rediscovered the love for retro Hindi music Every semester, I get to know about more people in our college whom if I had not met, I would have regretted it. I met a person with a heart as clean as anyone could have, and as supremely talented as anyone you could find. Another, for whom I am going to reserve my words. He has had an effect on my no one else has had, in the second half of this year. We have spent a lot of time bitching, having meaningful conversations, treats and all. Nariyal paani abi baaki hai.


Each moment of this year, especially the latter part has been thought of as a race. A race to prepare for placements and CAT. I have had think twice before spending some time on enjoyment. Like before watching a movie on my lappy, I had to rethink atleast once, but always went ahead with it anyway. Internship interviews - win for some, lose for some, and the dangling swords of placements for next year, have assured that not only me, everyone else has become serious too. I am a part of a funny batch, and I have enjoyed all the instances when I have disagreed with their views, and there have been plenty this year.


The exams will never leave us until we die. I always figured the formula to score high, but never applied it. My exam friend made them bearable. I had somebody who was always in a more fucked up situation than I was. We had some of our best chats in the days of exams, and we talked little excluding the exam days. We promised that we all will go on a road trip to Mumbai once we all get placed. I am already ready to term it the time of my life.


How can I forget the sweetest and most innocent girl who is a part of my life. She is out of station right now. She is much like me. We have seen both sides of the coin this year. There were periods when I shouted at her like she was a stone, and times when I silently told myself what good was anything in this world if she wasn't with me.


When I started with this post, I had a gloomy outlook about this year but the post made me think and threw up various moments to amaze me. How can I forget when we all went to Old Fort and had a great time. We reached late everywhere but how does it matter, Anish was there with us. Bhaiya , aapka naam kya hai ? Me Atri, and Rajdeep pulled off a daredevil stunt, which in retrospect seems could have had been life-threatening, Raj had almost ensured it. That epic pic of all of us outside Old Fort. Ishq-e-Dilli.


All those dates and double dates, in science museums, at the zoo , at historical sites ( where I was to contract Malaria) are also memorable. INDIA WON THE WORLD CUP. What else could I ask for, being one the immensely fortunate ones to see India win the WC in my life.


By the end of next year, important decisions would have been taken. There would be a price tag on me (read : placements). I would be more calm by the end of next year. It's definitely going to be an eventful year and I am really all ready to LIVE IT. I will try to go on as many dates with her as possible and outings with my friends. Yhey are the only days one remembers at the end of the year. This year will see many treats, much more than this year. My stomach tells me it's ready.
@2012 : AAAN DO !!!


Love, Happyness and Life to you all,
Spectator.

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